Episode 17 - The Gunpowder Thief
It had been three weeks since Captain Cognito's flagship, Grim Reaper, and Maniac Moose's Baron Boat had left Curacao.
The two ships had made good progress in their journey west towards the island of Santa Catalina.
Within a few days, the pirates would begin preparations for their attack on the Sisterhood of Pirates outpost, and hopefully put an end to the hags' hopes of claiming the Spanish Treasure fleet for themselves.
Meanwhile, Admiral Tew and Captain Mako had plans of their own, namely to reach Puerto Bello before Coggy and Moose got anywhere near the Treasure Fleet, and thus claim the booty for the Dark Water Alliance. But first they had a rendezvous to keep with Iguana Jack near the small Spanish town of Nombre de Dios.
The Alliance flagship, Insurrection, had spent many weeks sailing the shipping lanes in the Gulf of Darien - attacking Spanish ships and unsuspecting traders. Admiral Tew had amassed quite a haul, but in doing so, had also attracted several bounty hunters to the area.
One such bounty hunter was Captain Creed. The Frenchman had been shadowing Tew for several years, determined to claim the handsome bounty on the Admirals head issued during the Alliance wars. Creed had waited in Curacao after being informed of Tew's imminent arrival, but he had grown impatient and decided to follow up a few tavern rumors. Those rumors led the Frenchman to prepare his newly acquired Fluyte for an early departure and head along the Spanish Main, searching for a ship matching the Insurrection's description.
In Curacao, Creed was about to board his new ship when Mr. Myrehn's Dutch manservant came running along the dockside and up to the gangplank, "Ahoy Captain Creed!" he called as he greeted the Frenchman.
Creed turned and faced the man who was trying to regain his composure and gasping for breath after his sprint.
"Captain Creed, since my government has been gracious enough to loan you this fine vessel, I'd be pleased if you could deliver this important letter to an acquaintance of yours," said the Dutchman as he made his way up the gangplank towards the Captain.
"It's for the attention of Mister Jones" he explained.
Creed paused for a moment, then took the envelope which was sealed with candle wax, "Arrr I aint sure if'n I'll be seeing Davey Jones again. 'Appen we weren't exactly shipmates." replied the Captain.
The Dutchman looked a little disappointed, but Creed added, "However, if'n our paths should ever cross again someday, I'll gladly deliver it fer thee" he replied.
The Dutchman smiled and thanked the Captain, tipped his hat to him, and quickly made his way back through the dockside crowds and into town. Creed took another look at the envelope, wondered what it was about, and placed it inside his tunic before finally boarding his ship.
Back in Tortuga...
The Ye House of Pyrates tavern was bustling with activity. Its landlord, Captain Crash, had recently returned from visiting one of his many wives over in Tampico. He was recounting some of his latest escapades with the locals as they listened on with interest.
"Mateys, on me way back from tha Gulf 'o Mexico, we sails on up to da Caymans," explained Crash, "'Appen I's got me a fine brewery thar, 'an a few liquor warehouse's too."
The barkeeper patted his mate on the back and informed the small gathering that Crash's brewery and vineyards produced the finest ale, whiskey, and wine in the entire Caribbean.
"Anyhow" continued Crash, "I goes 'n see's me mate, Jack the Slimy, 'an tha bugger informed me dat less than four days previous, a friggin' grog smuggler had visited me properties 'n looted tha buggers dry… took me bestest Malt Whisky - da bastid!"
The Captain looked a little flushed and irate at loosing his lucrative stock. He took a drink from his tankard and continued, "Well, needless ta say, I've returned to Tortuga without a drop 'o grog to replenish this 'ere tavern 'o mine."
The gathered locals grumbled their disapproval at the news.
"So friends… tis that very reason - and none other I tells ye! - that I's reluctantly having ta raise tha prices 'o what little stock we has left in da cellar." finished the disappointed Crash.
A louder chorus of discontentment echoed around the tavern.
Just then, the tavern door flew open and in stumbled a scruffy-looking pirate with bloodshot eyes and a half-empty bottle of beer in his one good hand. The pirate, Blackhawk, had been released from Tortuga prison earlier that day and he had spent his first day of freedom getting drunk on cheap ale.
"Arrr... <hic> If'n it aint dat good old bastid, Cap'n Crash... <hic>" mumbled Blackhawk as he stumbled his way over to the gathering at the bar. "I've just been down at tha Silver Sloop Tavern 'n deys sellin' grog at half tha price ye is!" he said.
"Blackhawk, ye drunken swine ye.... I's told ye yer not welcome in me tavern..." called an irritated Crash as the gathered customers soon dispersed and headed for the door.
The fowl-smelling drunkard propped himself up against the bar and spilt his bottle over the Captain, "Sorry bout dat...matey… I's celebrating me recent liberation from jail... <hic>" blabbered Blackhawk.
"Go and celebrate it someplace else..." replied Crash as he wiped the splashes of ale from his tunic.
"So yer not interested in me lil' proposition. I takes it?" replied Blackhawk as he gave the Captain a sly wink.
Crash wasn't impressed, but the wily old sea dog gave his unwelcome guest the benefit of the doubt. "So what ye sellin' dis time?" he asked.
"Sellin? Sellin? Do I look like I has <belch> something ta sell? I's just been released from dat 'ell hole on tha hill... <hic> What ye see is what I's got - nottin'" replied the drunkard.
"Well don't keep me in suspense, man. What's dis 'proposition' ye 'as?" said Crash, with growing impatience in his voice.
"Well matey. 'Appen I be needin' a few kegs 'o gunpowder <hic> - don't ask me what fer." explained Blackhawk, before continuing, "I jus' needs 'em an' in return - I'll gladly pay ye a 'undred pieces 'o eight fer each keg - as soon as I get me 'ands on some swag <hic>"
Crash shook his head, "Be off with thee!" he barked, as he finally lost patience with his visitor.
Later that evening...
Blackhawk had sobered up a little. The pirate had spent the last couple of hours milling around town looking for a way to raise some badly needed funds to buy the gunpowder. In desperation, he'd decided to risk a one-man raid on the towns' magazine and armory, and luckily managed to get away with a considerable haul while the guards were watching the nearby execution of Captain Moby.
His stolen wagon contained two-dozen kegs of gunpowder and a casket of pistols.
Quickly glancing around him - to make sure no one was around, the gunpowder thief quietly patted a sorry looking mule tied to the wagon and began guiding it up the steep incline leading to Tortuga Jail.
"Steady as she goes...." whispered the pirate as he tugged on the beasts reins and led it into the dimly lit courtyard where a local guard lay in drunken unconsciousness.
Within a few moments, the pirate had found a secluded corner and had untied the mule from the wagon before starting to unload the gunpowder kegs.
Inside their prison cell, Captain Red Chaos and Undead Jack looked on with excitement on seeing their mates' return, while Excaliber, Greenbeard, and Captain Green Eye remained sleeping in their bunks.
"I told ye that bugger would come back 'n bust us out!" proclaimed Red in a hushed voice.
"What's he doin'?" asked Undead Jack as he strained to peer through the prison bars across the window.
"Not sure - it looks like tha git is unloadin' something off a wagon." whispered Red as he tried to make out what the shadowy figure was doing.
Just then, Lieutenant Excaliber awoke from his light slumber and approached the two swabs by the window. "What ye doing?" he inquired.
"Ssshhh - tis Blackhawk. Me thinks he's come good on his word an' is gonna bust us out!" whispered Red with contained excitement. The three inmates continued watching Blackhawk for a few moments.
In the courtyard below, the pirate had finished unloading the last of the powder kegs and was positioning the barrels around the building. He hadn't noticed the mule wander off - towards the sleeping guard!
From the cell window above, the anxious Lieutenant Excaliber tried desperately to attract pirates' attention..."Pssst, Blackhawk!" he whispered - but to no avail.
Undead Jack appeared at the window again, "What's up?" he quietly asked.
"Blackhawk's dumb ass is about ta wake that thar guard!" replied the worried Lieutenant.
Meanwhile, Blackhawk had finished with the last gunpowder keg and congratulated himself on his handy work. Looking up for a second, the smiling pirate soon had a look of great concern as he watched the mule begin licking the face of the prison guard - who by now was stirring from his drunken slumber!
"Chroist almighty!!!" shouted the anxious Undead Jack.
"Whhaaa what da....." mumbled the startled guard as he wiped the mule saliva from his stubble chin.
The man abruptly got to his feet and dropped his bottle of grog. Still finding his bearings, he looked at the mule with confusion before glancing around him.
Blackhawk stepped back into the shadows and stood in complete silence - wondering what to do next.
Whilst in their cell, the three prisoners anxiously watched as the guard stumbled around in the dark before finally lighting his lantern.
The whole courtyard lit up and the prisoners saw for the first time what Blackhawk had been doing - for around the base of the main building, housing the prisoners of Tortuga, he'd placed twenty-four kegs of gunpowder. Each keg had a trail of powder leading to it from the barrels next to it.
"I don't friggin' believe it!" proclaimed Undead Jack on witnessing the sight, "That friggin' fools gonna blow dis place ta perdition's edge!"
Undead Jack's concerns where heard by Greenbeard and his cousin, Captain Green Eye, who both awoke from their slumber and the five prisoners looked down into the courtyard in silence.
Within moments the guard had noticed the first barrel of powder - forcing Blackhawk to brake his cover and sheepishly make his way over to the man.
"Arrr, matey. Thanks fer finding me mule. I's been lookin' fer tha elusive critter all day...." he said, as he approached the startled guard.
"Who da 'ell are ye? What's going on 'ere?" mumbled the man, before being set upon by the pirate!
Blackhawk struck the guard in the gut before proceeding to knock him to the ground.
The prisoners above continued to watch the commotion below. "What's goin' on?" asked a puzzled Greenbeard… but no one answered.
Blackhawk reached down and retrieved the empty bottle of grog before striking the guard over the head with it. The guard stumbled back and fell to the floor - unconscious.
Anxiously looking around him, the pirate quickly made for the secluded corner and set the first line of gunpowder alight before running into the centre of the courtyard.
Looking up at the cell window, he motioned for his mates to take cover.
"I'll meet ye at tha rendezvous point - 6am on tha 'morrow..." called the pirate in a hushed voice, before jumping onto the mule and making a quick exit down the hill and back towards town.
The five inmates watched in horror as the line of gunpowder ferociously burned its way towards the first keg. "We's 'ad it!" called the anxious Excaliber.
"Aye, that darn fool is gonna blow half 'o Tortuga ta 'ell - who told him ta use so much bleedin' powder?" added Red as the men scrambled their way to the far end of the cell and covered themselves with blankets and mattresses.
"WILL ONE 'O YEW BASTIDS TELL US WHATS GOING ON?" barked the still confused, and extremely angry, Greenbeard.
Again no one answered. The pirates cowered in silence - awaiting the explosion that would send them, and half of the prison, to Davey Jones' Locker.
A few tense moments passed. But nothing happened…
Sheepishly peering from behind his mattress, Undead Jack slowly emerged - followed by Captain Green Eye and Greenbeard.
Jack gingerly made his way to the cell window and peered through.
"What's happened?" came the muffled voice of Excaliber from beneath his layer of blankets.
Undead Jack remained silent.
Gradually, Captain Red and the others emerged from their hideaway and slowly moved towards the cell window to take a look for themselves.
"Me thinks it went out..." replied Undead Jack - just as a massive explosion ripped through the courtyard and blew masonry, wood, and half the prison apart!
The explosion lit up the night sky, and in quick succession, each keg of powder erupted into their own fireballs - taking with them large sections of the jail.
The pirates were blown off their feet and piles of rubble came crashing down on top of them as their building was reduced to a smoldering pile of stone.
All hell broke loose in the courtyard as confused prison guards and local militia stumbled about in the dust-filled air trying to figure out what was happening, and within moments, dazed prisoners began to emerge from the ruins before quickly fleeing.
In their cell, the five dust-covered souls emerged and looked on in awe at the gaping hole in their cell.
"Well, whadda we waitin fer?" called Red as he stumbled over the masonry and clambered through the hole.
The others quickly followed and within a few seconds, the five prisoners had made their way through the courtyard and had joined the rest of the fleeing inmates before disappearing into the night.